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Chords D xx0232 G 3x0003 Em 022000 A7 x02020 A x02220 Bm x24432 F# 244322 Verse 1 D G Kenesaw Mountain Landis was a bad mother fucker D Em A7 He was seventeen feet tall, he had a hundred and fifty wives D G He didn't do that much except he saved the game of baseball D G D A7 He put two and two together and he noticed it was four D G D A7 Now the treachery of Shoeless Joe can't hurt us anymore D G A7 D A(break) And he'll always be remembered as Kenesaw Mountain Landis Verse 2 D G Fellow named Joe Jackson was a fielder for the Black Sox D Em A7 And he always wore his black socks, but he never wore no shoes D G He weren't the nicest fellow and he had a couple problems D G D A7 Cause he drank a lot and he beat his wife and he always acted rude D G D A7 He killed and ate some babies and he copped an attitude D G A7 D A(break) And the one man that he hated most was Kenesaw Mountain Landis Bridge 1 Bm Mafia said Shoeless Joe F# You should really run this show D You should be the guy who owns baseball Bm And all you really gotta do F# Is help us make a buck or two D G A7 We'll bet on the other team D G A7 You'll lose the game but make it seem D G A7 Like nothing could be further from the truth [ Tab from: http://www.guitaretab.com/j/jonathan-coulton/271888.html ] Verse 3 D G Shoeless Joe did what they said he dropped a couple fly balls D Em A7 And he walked up to the pitcher and he poked him in the eye D G And in the seventh inning with the Black Sox nearly beaten D G D A7 There was someone who was watching from his blimp above the stands D G D A7 Cradling a rifle in his thick and meaty hands D G A D A(break) And as if you hadn't guessed yet it was Kenesaw Mountain Landis Bridge 2 Bm Kenesaw said drop that glove F# Or I swear by God above D I'll make you regret playing baseball Bm Shoeless Joe looked up and saw F# The silver rifle's gaping maw D G A7 Though no one had noticed yet D G A7 His underwear was getting wet D G A7 He peed himself in front of everyone Slow Verse D G Shoeless Joe was finished but he couldn't quite admit it D Em A7 So he raised his middle finger up above the other four D G Kenesaw took careful aim and fired a single bullet D G D A7 And he shot that dirty finger off and he dropped his trusty gun D G D A7 And everybody in the stands knew that he had won D G A7 D And today they still refer to him as Kenesaw Mountain Landis Final Verse D G Shoeless Joe left baseball and became a famous pop star D Em A7 D And he asked the musical question is she really going out with him G He had a couple albums and a comeback in the 80's D G D A7 But he never won a Grammy and he never was the same D G D A7 And he never could be satisfied with critical acclaim D G A7 D A7 Cause the critics all confused him with the great Elvis Costello D G A7 D Yes the critics all confused him with the great Elvis Costello |